Paternity Tests and Poptarts

It has been a long week at the Moses house. Bailey, age 3, has a nasty stomach bug that won’t seem to go away. I’ve perfected the art of puke proofing our furniture and can do an amazing amount of laundry between the hours of 1 a.m.-6 a.m. I also live in fear of my other kids catching this virus. So far, so good. One of my friends said, “I sure hope you don’t get it.” I have decided that simply isn’t an option.

Yesterday poor Bailey just couldn’t stay awake and would not drink anything. We decided (well I may have been a bit pushy with Dr. Dad) that she needed IV fluids at our local hospital. So I stopped and got the orders and headed over to the infusion lab. The nurses had a hard time finding a good vein and after four tries, numbing gel, some serious personal space invasion (my apologies to two very sweet ladies who had my knees in their chest and who knows what else… Seriously, it’s not worth explaining), the needle was in and the precious fluid was flowing into Bailey’s tiny arm. I was sweating bullets, my friend Rachel (who is a pharmacist at the hospital and got the pleasure of helping me restrain my kid) was almost crying, and Bailey just wanted to go back to sleep. Thank goodness “Jake and the Neverland Pirates” was coming on Disney channel at that very moment and I was able to distract my sweetie by pretending Sharky and Bones were the most magnificent musicians I’ve seen since that awesome Milli Vanilli concert back in the day (Yes, I really went to their concert. I’m not ashamed. I feel when something that dark is part of your past you just have to own it).

Bailey was able to sleep through most of the process. This is nothing short of miraculous because the patient next to us really loved Jerry Springer and whatever other horrible show comes on after Springer. Volume was not their concern and I found myself eagerly waiting to hear how the paternity tests were going and if after all these years he really WAS the father. Turns out he wasn’t.

Nurse Whitney brought me some lunch and Rachel showed up with a healing McDonald’s Coke. I felt like a celebrity. I ate while Bailey was asleep and hid my chips under a chair because I felt so guilty eating when she couldn’t. Finally, it was time to go home. Bailey is quite proud of the battle wounds on her hand and she is improving. This morning she woke up and said in a very concerned voice, “Mommy, I dreamed there was a Poptart in my room.” I guess the lack of food is starting to get the best of her.

It’s exhausting when a little one is ill but we are lucky because we know this will come and go, a mere glitch in our routine. The water association might even give us an award for most gallons of water used in a five day period.